How to make your marriage last long? 8 useful tips

A marriage is a union between two parties. If one can find a suitable partner, it can be one of the best relationships in life. Most couples spend a happy married life during the initial stage. When they get more responsibilities with job demands, children, or relationships with family and friends, the love and respect between them can start to diminish.

Spouses need commitment and compromises from each other. A marriage does not exist on a giving and taking basis. Spouses should make some sacrifices for the smooth functioning of the marital relationship. Following are some of the tips to build up a strong relationship with your spouse for a happy and healthy marriage.

1.Sharing love and respect

When parties get married, they just get ready for an experiment. They need to understand the character traits of one another that create similarities and dissimilarities between them.

If a spouse is skillful in identifying the thought process and the behavior of the other spouse, it will be easy to live together for a long time.  Every human being is unique in all aspects and a person needs to be loved and respected for who he or she is.

If there are major differences between both parties that interrupt the well-being of the family unit, they can discuss mutually and make their personalities more flexible and approachable.

2.Exchanging gifts

Exchange of gifts on special occasions can be a great opportunity to let know the other party that you love and care for him or her. Birthdays, anniversaries, or holidays can be the perfect time to gift something the other party likes and express your affection.

How much one can afford for a gift depends on one’s financial capacity. Regardless of the monetary value of the gift, it is rewarding to see how the other party feels happy by receiving your gift.

3.Allocate household chores reciprocally

In a household, it is difficult for one party to take care of all the household concerns. Depending on the working hours and schedules of each party, they can share the household responsibilities. In some families, one party carries out more burdens such as child care, domestic work as well as working full-time.

It is overwhelming to handle all the concerns and parties need to allocate responsibilities mutually. Working as a team can be more successful and give value to the time and labor of each individual.

4.Setting up a family budget

In most jurisdictions, the property earned during the existence of marriage belongs to both parties. Therefore, setting up a family budget helps you managing household expenses properly.

Spend some time gathering data on your income level and outgoing expenses. Then it is easy for you to invest in priorities and cut off any unnecessary expenses. For example, you can cut off any expenses toward traveling and focusing on paying off your mortgage.

Concerning future impediments, it is also beneficial to have a family emergency fund as well. If not planned properly, financial hardships can make your life difficult. Think of an insurance plan to cover up emergency situations.

This way, spouses can consume money without forgoing basic comforts and necessities of life. Further, they can and save money for the future as well.

5.Keeping the household tidy

There is a saying “east or west, home is the best.” For all of us, there is nothing like being at home. When there is pressing work to be done, house cleaning does not seem to be crucial. Yet, an untidy home makes a huge impact on the overall mental and physical health of household members.

Sometimes, one party is a neat freak while the other party enjoys the clutter. On such occasions, it is good to support maintaining the cleanliness of the house without messing it up. Otherwise, one spouse can get exhausted by cleaning the house all the time.

When the environment of the household is decluttered and organized, it is convenient for everyone and saves a lot of time.  

6.Not looking down on each other

In family life, both spouses should contribute to its success equally. Irrespective of one’s job title or social status, a new union is created with the contract of marriage. Therefore, no one should try to contempt the other party.

Contempt can be through body gestures or direct or indirect words. It can destruct the relationship with your partner.

Both spouses may have defects and things to improve because no one is perfect. It is often seen that parties react in a harsh way toward the mistakes of the other party.

Healthy communication practices help coming out of any misunderstandings or disagreements between spouses. Even if there is a disagreement, both parties should work together to get it resolved and not look down on the other person.

Also, spouses should be careful not to talk ill of the better half with others. Generally, family matters should be kept to themselves, so that any problem can be resolved inside the household.

Cultivating a sense of appreciation toward your spouse benefits a mutual relationship. Remember the things he or she has done to make your life easy and comfortable.

For more details, read The power of mindful speech

7.Not having extra marital relationships

Married partners are supposed to be content within the marriage. Whatever the circumstances may be, spouses should not go beyond the limits of the company of each other. Still in some countries, adultery is considered to be a serious offense punished by law.

If one partner cheats on the other partner, the trust between them disappears. When the trust is gone, a marriage cannot prevail. Thus, both parties need discipline in mind and body to be faithful to one another.

8.Helping the relatives and friends of both sides equally

It is natural for any person to tend toward the biological family as opposed to relations acquired through other means because of the blood relationship. When it comes to a marriage, it is important to treat relatives and friends of both sides alike. If one spouse treats own family more than the other spouse’s family, the neglected spouse can get hurt.

If you got a lot of family members on both sides and have a long list of birthday parties all year long, it is better to keep an equal budget for each and every event. 

On a final note, marriage is a long-term commitment and both parties need to make that commitment. Parties get together to support in bitter and sweet moments. Better financial planning, communication, love, and respect, etc. can thrive your marriage life while giving avenues to last it longer.

Photo by freestocks on Unsplash


Rathsara (Sara) is an attorney-at-law who holds a Diploma in Buddhist Studies in ITBMU. She has engaged in community service in Sri Lanka and the United States helping many individuals. She is interested in reading, writing, and researching areas related to mindfulness. Inspired by spiritually developed individuals around the globe, Rathsara is keen to learn and practice mind-developing techniques. In the meantime, she would like to share her experience and knowledge for the well-being of others.

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