Mindfulness based self-care

“It is our lack of love for ourselves that inhibits our compassion toward others. If we make friends with ourselves, then there is no obstacle to open our hearts and minds to others. Forgive others not because they deserve it, but because you need peace.” Pema Chodron

How many times have you asked yourself “how are you doing?” This is the first thing we ask from others all the time. Yet, we rarely take time to ask it from ourselves.

Understanding how are you doing is a way to self-care. If you really spend a few mindful moments, you will realize you need to be friendly with yourself. That will help to come out of any negativity within you.

This article elaborates on how to boost self-care with mindfulness.

What is self-care?

Self-care is about taking time to oversee your mental and physical wellness.

only a few of us work toward uplifting the mind while most of the others are keen on maintaining a healthy body.

However, both are equally important in implementing self-care.

How to boost self care?

Real self-care comes through a healthy mind. A healthy mind can be developed by practicing loving-kindness meditation on a regular basis.

Why self care is not selfish?

There are certain stereotypes about self-care. Everyone looks up to a person who places others before him. However, self-care is the core for becoming a compassionate person who cares about others. If you feel neglected because you have no time to care for yourself, you cannot care about another person.

Therefore, self-care is not a selfish act.

Why self-care has become a trending topic?

Self-care has become a trending topic in the contemporary world. People are busy with long to-do lists and do not have time to take care of themselves.

Thus, there are numerous products and services that offer you self-care packages. Although those packages are eye-catching, they cost you money.

Nevertheless, loving kindness as an aspect of self-care is free of charge, and has the ability to cure yourself within.

How to start self care?

Spreading loving-kindness to yourself is the perfect way to accept yourself for who you are, let go of all the negativities in the mind, and form feelings of goodwill toward ourselves.

Unless you make self-care a habit of your life, you cannot let go of the negativities within you. With the negativities, you cannot feel good about yourself and about others.

When we grow up, we tend to place others before ourselves. Especially, parents sacrifice so much for their children and they have little time for themselves.

Therefore, you should start taking care of yourself when you are strong and healthy. Begin to practice loving-kindness for a few minutes per day. This practice will help you throughout your life to maintain a healthy mind.

What is loving-kindness meditation?

Loving-kindness meditation is a method to extend the boundaries of your mind by wishing your wellness as well as that of others. This technique was used by the Buddha thousands of years ago in ancient India. From then, people have used this technique and received immense benefits that completely changed their lives.

For more information, read Loving kindness meditation: Beginner’s guide

What is the benefit of spreading loving-kindness to yourself first?

The answer is very simple. You can share only what you have. You cannot share what you do not have.

It is the same principle that applies in loving-kindness meditation. Fill your heart with love and kindness. Then share it with others. Be friendly with yourself then share it with others.

How to spread loving kindness to yourself?

Find a quiet spot where you will not be disturbed by sounds, people, or any other distraction. I prefer somewhere in nature that makes me refreshed and relaxed. Sit in a comfortable posture.

When spreading loving kindness, first you need to get rid of any discomfort such as body pain that can trigger anger in you.

  • Keep your hands gently clasped in front of you
  • Take a few deep breaths, to relax yourself
  • Bring your awareness to the present moment
  • For example, keep your attention on the touch of the breath as you inhale and exhale
  • Dive deep into your inner thoughts to see if you have any negative feelings in you
  • Then recollect a past memory of yourself in which you feel happy about yourself

With the happiness in your heart, contemplate, “may I be well, happy, and peaceful, may no harm come to me, may no difficulty come to me. May I be free from all sufferings.”

Stay in the meditative mode for a 10-15 minutes.

At the end of the meditation session, you feel happy, relaxed, and refreshed.

Why does loving-kindness important?

  • Provides a time to reflect on you
  • It is the best opportunity to cleanse the negativities in you
  • When the negativities are gone, you can come out of stress, depression etc.
  • Loving kindness improves happiness
  • Increases self-awareness
  • Our relationships with others will improve
  • You will perform better

Why loving kindness is the best beauty product?

We spend so much time and money on various beauty products to conceal our true appearance from the world outside. However, if your mind is full of negativities, it mirrors your face. Even if you do not wear any make-up, a kind heart mirrors on the face.

When you cultivate loving kindness, you feel better and your appearance becomes pleasant to others. Thus, you do not have to wear any beauty products. Also, it is absolutely harm-free. So make sure to use this beauty product daily.

Finally, allowing an opportunity to understand and grow yourself is an important part of self-care. Loving-kindness is one of the best ways to take care of yourself. Take this golden opportunity to practice loving-kindness for your goods as well as for the goodness of others.

Photo by Alysha Rosly on Unsplash


Rathsara (Sara) is an attorney-at-law who holds a Diploma in Buddhist Studies in ITBMU. She has engaged in community service in Sri Lanka and the United States helping many individuals. She is interested in reading, writing, and researching areas related to mindfulness. Inspired by spiritually developed individuals around the globe, Rathsara is keen to learn and practice mind-developing techniques. In the meantime, she would like to share her experience and knowledge for the well-being of others.

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